I found the solution! At first, I was putting in all the settings I thought I could possibly put in on my phones end to NOT connect unless I told it to connect. And then on my computers end I was going to "Startup" in the task manager and disabling Phone Link, but sure enough, soon as I'd fire my computer up, it would automatically start and link. Then I'd shut it off on my computer end, but if it was still open on my phone end then computer end would just re-open and reconnect. SUPER FRUSTRATING.
OK HERE'S THE FIX: (I'm in Windows 11 fyi, but I imagine 10 will be similar). I went to search (Magnifying glass on taskbar) and typed in "app settings" and what popped up was "Apps & Features". Clicked on that, opens up, and you get an app list, you can scroll down to find it or just type in the app search bar "Phone Link". Click the 3 little dots to the right and click on "Advanced Options". Then you'll see "Background apps permissions" and a drop down menu. It's default setting is "Power Optimized (recommended)". Change that to "Never".
Boom, rebooted my computer. Let the startup fully run, no sign of Phone Link. But then I went and opened it up purposely and it fired right up!
VIDEO LINK HERE OF THE STEPS