Dear clay lenny
Welcome to Microsoft Community.
Sorry to know that you cannot find your emails and you are trying to recover them, this is a really bad situation for you, also, I will guide you on make a contact with our online support for help with this later.
Can you find your email in outlook.live.com?
Outlook.live.com communicate directly with the mail servers, the emails you see come directly from the servers, if you can't find them, it means that your emails have been permanently deleted from the servers and cannot be recovered.
Contact online support
Go to this site: Contact - Microsoft Support
1. Enter your question (Email recovery) Click Get Help, and then click contact support at the bottom of the page.
2. Sign in to any of your personal Microsoft accounts. Even new accounts are accepted.
3. Under Products & Services, select "Other Products."
4. Under the category, select "Outlook" and click Confirm.
5. Click on "Chat with a support agent in your browser."
Be sure to contact online support during local hours for the best support experience. Online support is not always open.
I'm sorry for the inconvenience this has caused, in the meantime I hope you can try to remember if you saved these emails elsewhere or any backups, thank you for your understanding and cooperation.
Best regards
Schale.P-MSFT | Microsoft Community Support Specialist